I couldn't make this up if I TRIED...

You may have noticed that I've been FAR less active and around of late. I am finally able to explain.

John (that's my hubby, for those who didn't know) and I had been noticing some electrical problems at home. When the washer was running, the image on the TV would "dance" in time with the agitator. If we started the dryer, it would dim everything. And it was already 90 degrees in APRIL and this house has no central heat or air...so it was HOT.

We were, understandably, concerned. The landlords, who happen to be John's parents, had just had TWO surgeries...Mom's broken arm in Feb, and Dad's back stimulator thing in March. They'd also had to replace a hot water heater in November, and the water line from the street to the house in March. We were really concerned about new electrical problems and the effect this might have on their budget. As a result, we'd been opting to just live with it so far.

Last Wednesday (4.12.06) we were on our way to work when John discovered he had a flat tire. Crap. We went to get it replaced, only to find out 2 HOURS later that they couldn't replace it; there was something bent that needed repaired first. OK. Drove across town to another place that could repair the bent bit and replace the tires. By now, most of the morning was shot. John and I spent the day working from home and then went to pick up the now repaired car. This was about $500 of work. :(

Thursday (4.13.06) John had a pre-interview screening test over the phone in the afternoon, so he had to leave work early that day. Since I'd gone in with him, I too, had to leave early. That worked; I'd set an appointment for the dog to see the vet since he was making a nasty coughing noise (before I knew I'd have to go in to work with him...and for those who don't know, work is an hour from home). I planned to take the dog, and his little doggy buddy, to the vet, then take them to go play somewhere and have fun. Alas, while AT the vet, Doggies caught sight/smell of another dog (surprise surprise) and nearly tore my foot off trying to get the other doggy. Actually, they just managed to cut a cute little 3 inch long gash across the top of my foot that promptly started to bleed. No park for puppies; I can't have dust blowing into the fresh wound, and I'm having trouble standing on that foot anyway. So I bring them home, John has his interview thing, and then we install a new window ac unit in the bedroom (because I haven't been sleeping AT ALL for the past 3 days while the temps so freaking HOT (and in APRIL, dammit!!), whereupon I slice the tip of one of my fingers open, too. Actually, it's 6 small slices, and none of them are as deep, but they bleed nicely.

Friday (4.14.06) I spend the WHOLE day in the office by myself, thoroughly confused, feeling utterly worthless, and wondering what the crap I'm supposed to be DOCUMENTING when I'm ALL THE FREAK ALONE. It was just a crappy day. I get home. No internet. Well, it's spotty. Everytime we turn on the AC, the TV goes off. Everytime the washer starts agitating, the connection goes down. We know that SOMETHING has to be done, but we don't have the energy to deal with jack. Oh, and I make snacks for the youth at my church who are having a special event this weekend.

Saturday (4.15.06) John and I go to church and help cook a meal for the youth for their event thingy. Still wonky power at home.

Sunday (4.16.06) John and I go to church. We come home. We rest. He naps. We go to church. John plays with the network and decides it the cable company, not us. I call the cable company. They schedule someone to come out between 8 am and NOON on Tuesday.

Monday (4.17.06) John goes to work. John calls me and tells me I have to get up, get dressed, so we can make it to a morning meeting an HOUR away in 30 minutes. I scramble. We go to the dumb meeting. During meeting, cable guy calls...I tell him I'm not in town today, but I'll be there tomorrow, when the appt is. John gets a call from the folks he had the screening thing with. They want to fly him down for an interview. We go to the new work offices (5 mins closer than the old ones). John tells the boss "I need Wed off...just to give you a heads up, I'm looking at going to Cisco. We spend the day assembling furniture. We go to lunch, I order yumness, get my pre-yumness salad (not bad, thank you) and promptly become ill. I spend the rest of the lunch debating the relative merits of toilet worship. I never actually worship the toilet (thank GOD). I assemble more furniture, cut boxes up, take trash out in 95+ degree weather, and then shut down because I'm SO miserable I can't stand myself. We go to IHOP and have icecream, soda, and internet access. I send my note and chat a WEEE little bit. I buy a Tulsa paper (if this interview goes as well as everyone expects it to, we'll be moving to Tulsa).

Tuesday (4.18.06) John goes to work. Cable guy comes. Turns out that the electrical systems at the house had co-opted the cable to complete the circuit and FRIED the cable. The guy won't touch the line to re-run it until the electrical issues are dealt with (smart man). I call electrician, and then insist that John come home...Cable guy has left me with the very STRONG impression that it's nothing short of a miracle that the house hasn't torched itself already. John comes home, he and I are frantically cleaning house. Electrician comes. Electrician ROCKS...he doesn't charge us one red cent to find out that the problem is with the electric company. I call the electric company. They come out. The wires run across the neighbor's yard, through their trees, and are TOUCHING our garage. More miracles are recognised. The electric company guy (8 feet tall at least, and no more than 80 pounds, I SWEAR, and approximately 60 years old) says he can't touch the trees, the neighbors aren't home and don't own it even if they were, and I don't know their landlord. Electric company guy climbs ladder to look at where it's LAYING on the garage, goes into the neighbor's yard, and discovers the trees aren't the issue at all. Well, not much. No, our wire has a SERIOUS problem. It seems squirrels have been having our electrical line for lunch. SQUIRRELS WERE EATING MY ELECTRICAL LINES. Apparently, he's seen this before, just not so thoroughly done...they've eaten it about half gone like some kind of mettalic squirrly corn on the cob thing. He splices in a new bit of line, and poof! ALL of our previously troublesome electrical problems are GONE. No more dancing TV screen, can have the AC, TV, washer, dryer, and microwave all on, all working, all at the same time. Great, but I still have a melted cable. Call the cable company and take John to buy new shoes for his interview tomorrow. Cable company calls. I LEAVE John at the mall, race home, and get here just as the cable guy (diff one) pulls up. He runs new wires, Dogs sit with me cheerfully, both the one who's found the great love of water in the 90+ degree weather, and the other who thinks he'll melt if he gets wet. I go pick John up, we go buy a new AC for the rest of the house, and arrange for installation. This is another $500 dollars. We pick up his suit that we had dry cleaned today to be ready for tomorrow, come home, and rest. I'm now sitting here, printing out stuff for his interview, making sure that everything is ready so he can get up, get dressed, and be out of the house by 6am tomorrow morning, to get to the airport by 7am, to be in Dallas by 9 am for a meeting at 9:45 am. He'll be home tomorrow evening, and we're hoping with a serious offer with the serious raide we've heard rumored (double his current salary!!)

Lets review.
I've been unable to get online because SQUIRRELS ATE MY ELECTRICAL LINE.

I'm hoping the reason I haven't found charred squirrel bodies is that the dogs mistook them for fresh h'ors d'oeuvres. That would be justice. Otherwise, I want to see some fried squirrel, dammit!

But All of that is behind me. I'm online again, I have power, and if all goes well, I could be moving to Tulsa before summer...that, judging from this April, will be roughly 10 degrees HOTTER than the inside of an erupting volcano.

Like I said, I couldn't make it up if I TRIED.

1 comment:

Heather said...

Wednesday, my car broke down. The timing belt went out. Thursday, John was let go from his job (with a severance package). He came home and took me to pick up my car from a mechanic that made me feel slimy just talking to him. *shudders*

Monday, 4.24.06, John got the call offering him the job, which he accepted yesterday afternoon. Tomorrow we're driving to Tulsa to look for a place to live in hopes of moving this weekend.

It makes me tired just to think of it...or is that all the work I've been doing frying my brain on engineering diagrams and then packing all evening?

Just thought folks would appreciate the update.