I didn't write this...but it's still amusing!


Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good !

Q: Aren' t fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO ..... Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

And remember: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to Skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!" So friends, why worry? Eat, drink and be merry.


Johari & Nohari Windows

A friend sent me a link to her Johari window, and I was intrigued, so I got my own, and then after just a wee bit of research, I got a Nohari window, as well.

Go for it...let me know what you think. :D



OK, OK, I know, it's been a while since I posted. Months even. Yah, yah, deal wit' it.


OK, last time I posted, I had 2 kitties, 1 fish, a new puppy, and hopes that the heat had broken. I think Moe was still hanging on then anyway...

Moe didn't make it. Guess he knew his time was limited, and he floated finally. Poor Moe. I'd be more heartbroken if I hadn't bought him to amuse the cats anyway.

The break in the heat didn't really make it, either. We've not had a winter yet. In fact, if you're paying attention, and the news stops obsessing with the Left Coast long enough, you might notice that much of OK has burned in the past few months while a drought leaves us too parched to water willynilly, but fire dangers leave the risk of what happens if we don't water willynilly way too stinkin' high... I miss winter.

Bear's still here, and actually, so are Kit and Lady. Bear's been joined though, as of New Years Eve, by Grizzly, who looks like a bigger, redder version of the same dog. Grizzly taught Bear the fine art of running away multiple times a day, so we spent most of January trying to find new ways to keep the dogs in while they spent the time trying to find new ways of getting out. An electric fence has the problem almost solved, but they can still get out when we open the garage door...so we're still looking for a solution that will work there. Still, they're GORGEOUS dogs, very friendly, and so cheerfully, blissfully ignorant that running away is a bad thing when they get back (they LOVE car rides, the little stink pots)...we can't help ourselves; we love the little idiots. Actually...not so much little. Grizzly was 73 pounds when last we weighed him, and Bear was close to 30 pounds. They're very good at knocking me off my feet and dogpiling me...literally. Obedience school is coming in March....1 hour a week, for 8 weeks. Maybe we can get them to come when they're called, more than just when they're in the mood to...

John took a new job, leaving OneNet at the end of January. He'd been with them since Jan 01, so this is a BIG adjustment for him. It's with a new start up, and he's doing Wireless Internet Consulting. Actaully, at the moment, that means he's in Pittsburgh PA, planning to spend the morning driving all over Pittsburgh looking at trees and buildings and lights and towers to see what it will take to BUILD a wireless network for the entire city. When he gets home tomorrow, though, he gets a few weeks off from travelling, something we're both eager for.

I also took a new job, same company, different tune. See, the network guys go out and decide how to build their networks, then they come back, tell me what they saw, what that means, and I help write their reports and stuff. Anything that goes out anymore that required any writing prolly had a minimum of one of my fingers in it, at least to proof-read and grammar nit pick...stop laughing, really, I do well at my job!!

Jennifer moved to Beaver OK for about a month and then moved back to VA...but that meant I got to see my sweet Zoey bug again. My GOD, she's gorgeous. Yes, I am shamelessly in love with my neice. I adore all 9 of my neices, my nephew, and even the one on the way due this fall (Jen brought back something of her trip out here...but I met the daddy, and he seemed like a nice enough fellow, even if things didn't work out between them, sorry man!)

The current youngest neice, Emma, had heart surgery in January and is now home, recovering well. If you haven't been keeping up with Meredith's blog, you can do that here. Internet is amazing; I don't know that I could have stayed even remotely sane trying to keep up with the news from there without Meredy's updates to the web for us. My sister ROCKS. (Yes, all my sisters rock, thank you, I'm just citing one specific example at the moment :P ).

I'm now on my 4th (yes, FOURTH) bout of bronchitis for the 05-06 season. After the 3rd bout, I got the flu and pneumonia vaccines, and went in for allergy testing. 121 pin pricks later...I don't have to have allergy shots. That's something, at least. Alas, it didn't fix anything, or maybe, I wouldn't be on bout number 4. I'm off to a lung specialist next, because, seriously, this has to stop. Oh, and the doc yestererday mentioned that this might be mono, too. Yeah. No, I don't kiss any one but John, so no, I don't know how I got it. I went to San Francisco on a business trip with the guys...maybe I got it there. I don't know; I was healthy when I left OK, and I was sick before I got home. Who knows.

I hope to do more musical musings soon, but I don't know yet when...at the moment, being sick, I'm just taking each day as it comes, and going from there. Fortunately, the new job came with a laptop and the ability to work from home, so there's been little serious impact on my productivity that I haven't been able to work around. This is a very good thing. But alas, at the moment, my lungs are opting to leap out of my chest in yet another extended coughing fit (oh, wait, it passed, still...) so I'm going to cut this current stream-of-conciousness (or not) short, tell you all I'm still here, I still love all the same folks I loved before, and until you hear otherwise, that's pretty much not going to change.

See? That wasn't TOO painful, now was it?